GIGANTOPITHECUS, WE HARDLY KNEW YE: IN SEARCH OF MISSING LINKS
By Robert Voss
BUILT UP FROM A SKULLCAP AND ORANGUTAN’S JAW,
IN MANY OLD TEXTBOOKS, PILTDOWN MAN WE ALL SAW,
TEETH FILED TO LOOK HUMAN, AND STAINED TO LOOK OLD,
HIS LESSON FOR US: DON’T BELIEVE ALL YOU’RE TOLD.
TEN YEARS LATER, NEBRASKA MAN WE SALUTED.
FROM A SINGLE PIG’S TOOTH HE WAS RECONSTITUTED.
AND WHO CAN FORGET JAVA MAN’S FEARFUL LOOK?
A BIG GIBBON, FINAGLED FOR YOUR SCIENCE BOOK.
DEPICTIONS OF “NELLY” AND “LUCY” STILL SCARE US.
SADLY, BOTH ARE PREDOMINANTLY PLASTER OF PARIS.
THEIR DRAWINGS AND SCULPTURES BOTH BIASED CREATION,
MAN-LIKE FEATURES ENSUE FROM RICH IMAGINATION.
THE OPPOSITE’S TRUE FOR THE MAN FROM NEANDER;
APISH LOOKS AS THE ARTIST’S PEN TENDS TO MEANDER,
DESIGNED TO IMPRINT IN THE POPULAR MIND,
A CREATURE, NOT MAN, BUT A WHOLE DIFFERENT KIND.
NOT ONLY APE-MEN WERE DOCTORED, LORD KNOWS.
“PILT DOWN CHICKEN” AND MINIATURE HORSIES WITH TOES.
STILL IN SOME TEXTBOOKS, AS FAR AS THAT GOES,
ARE HAEKEL’S FAKED DRAWINGS OF CRITTER EMBRYOS.
FISH EXTINCT FOR MILLIONS OF YEARS, SO THEY SAID,
WASHED UP BY TSUNAMI, BUT UH-OH, FRESH DEAD.
AND COELACANTH, MOST RESILIANT FISH YET,
KEEPS SHOWING UP LIVE IN THE FISHERMAN’S NET.
SOME FRAUDS, SOME SINCERE, BUT ON EVERY OCCASION,
STRONG DEVOTION TO THEORY TRUMPS GOOD OBSERVATION.